As we all prepare to gather in the coming months with friends, family, co-workers and acquaintances, we may find ourselves feeling more than a little unsure about the potential for conflict and how best to navigate the ideological tripwires and tit-for-tat quicksand that presents itself while staying true to our values and beliefs and without losing our sanity or exhausting ourselves in the process.

Here are two things to keep in mind -

1- you do not have to show-up for every argument or baited conversation that you are invited to (some variation of “I won’t be talking to you about that today.” will suffice)

2- your presence has an impact on the energy of a gathering even if you never say a word (so taking the time to attune to peace or calm or Love or joy or connection or equality - whatever your truest intention is - makes a huge difference, even if it isn’t obvious)

I know that it may not feel like enough when the roar of the all or nothing binary “truth” is so loud as to seem real and absolute right now and that the urgency of it makes it seem like a moral imperative to counter every blow delivered, parry every swipe and stand ready to fight in the face of every not-nearly-as-benign-as-the-person-saying-it-would-like-everyone-to-believe comment floated into the conversation.

But it can be exhausting to hold that posture unceasingly and your energy is precious; you deserve to invest it in supporting what you wish to see built in this world (b/c shouting down your arrogant uncle or confidently listing the facts to counter your aunt’s fear-mongering are unlikely to bring about real progress - unless you have the extra capacity for it; if so, shout down and counter away 😉).

If you are feeling at all overwhelmed as you imagine navigating the next few months (or years), I want to share something with you … all is not lost.

When I settle in and connect deeply with the energies of this moment in the human story, I sense a mighty web of connection linking every being everywhere and this beautiful planet we call home.

This web is vibrant and pulses with our shared energies and presences. It does not need to be created - it exists effortlessly - but it does benefit from being well-tended (and we benefit from its tending as well).

And we sometimes forget about it - as we move through our day-to-day lives and activities, we can become numb to the impulses of connection that surround us - the overwatch of hawks and eagles lining our route to connect with a loved one; the smile of a stranger when they hear us humming to ourselves in the grocery store; the warmth in the heart of an often overlooked fellow human when we make eye contact and simply acknowledge the value of their existence; the text from a friend who just popped into our minds.

The noise of the outer world and our movement through it can sometimes drown out the far subtler hum of connection that moves through us and all around us - always. But we can awaken to that hum and remember that we are linked to all of life, are held by all of life, are one with everyone and everything when we take the time to tend our connections.

Practically speaking, this can be as simple as lovingly and intentionally tending the relationships in which our most honest and loving self is held, supported, encouraged and celebrated.

I was recently invited to guide a private healing circle for one such group of friends - these ladies have travelled the world together for years and have held each other through many of the elevated joys and devastating losses (and everything in between) that we encounter in a lifetime. So in the wake of the recent election here in the US and in light of the division and acrimony that threaten to take hold of even the most compassionate hearts, they came together to be held, to hold one another and to hold the world once again.

As you may know, I work very intuitively. Before a scheduled session - whether with an individual or a group - I open to possibility and (usually) gain a general sketch in my heart and head of how our time together will unfold. What emerged during this healing circle was such a beautiful, gentle and yet powerful practice (it was truly a privilege and a joy to be a part of bringing it to life 🙏) that I’d like to share an outline of it with you in hopes that it might support you in tending your valued connections lovingly.

The Practice:

Begin by asking everyone sit in a circle where you can all comfortable hold hands (in chairs, on the floor, standing or a combination of all is fine; as is most comfortable and accessible for your gathering).

Invite everyone to close their eyes and take a few slow, deep breaths to settle in.

Once they seem fairly settled (trust yourself), invite them to imagine plugging the bottom of their heart into Mother Earth and drawing her steadying and grounding energy up to their heart space to fortify its foundation. Stay with this for a few breaths (again, trust yourself to guide).

Next, invite them to imagine a thousand-petaled lotus flower blooming at the top of their head and opening to a vibrant flow of light from the heavens that pours down and into the top of their heart to replenish its natural vibrancy and their sense of light-heartedness. Stay with this for a few breaths (keep trusting yourself to know when to linger and when to move on).

Now invite them to hold their hands palm up and imagine that their heart space is filled to overflowing and that the overflow runs down their arms and pools in the palm of their hands. Linger here for a few breaths (yep - still trusting yourself).

And then invite them to stack their hands over their heart as if they were reinvesting the overflow back into themselves. Invite them to imagine the overflow energy extending beyond their heart space to fill their entire body, mind and spirit with the energy of healing or Love or compassion, etc. Stay with this visualization reminding everyone to receive from the overflow for as long as feels right (still trusting yourself to know when to move on).

Now ask everyone to hold hands with the right palm facing down and left palm facing up.

First, invite them to imagine the overflow energy flowing from their right palm into the left palm of the person next to them effortlessly - no need to push it; simply allow the overflow to flow.

Next, invite them to focus their attention on receiving the overflow of the person next to them into their left palm - again, no need to force anything; simply allow the left palm to be open to receive of the overflow of the group.

Finally, invite them to bring their attention to their heart space and visualize their overflow energy moving from person to person - intermingling with everyone else’s overflow and gently touching the hearts of each person as it travels around the circle.

Stay with each of these steps as long as feels right to you (b/c you are trusting yourself.)

With the group still holding hands, invite everyone to imagine that there is a pillar of light in the center of the circle that they can send their overflow energy to from the front of their heart space. Invite everyone to visualize the pillar as it becomes like a fountain that sends threads of healing, Love, compassion and grace to where it is most needed. Invite everyone to bring to mind someone, a situation or a place that they would like to direct the energy to and imagine a thread extending in that direction to offer what is most needed (healing, Love, compassion, grace, hope, etc).

Stay here for as long as you like (still trusting yourself).

Invite everyone to withdraw the cord that connects them to the pillar of light and draw their attention back to their heart space (as the guide of the practice, you may wish to take a moment to silently send gratitude to the pillar of light).

Invite them to once again imagine sending overflow energy around the circle - sending from the right palm and receiving through the left palm.

After a time, invite them to bring their palms back to their heart and visualize themselves receiving of the overflow.

After a time, invite them to send gratitude into the heavens before allowing the opening at the top of their head to close to the size that feels sustainable for them in their waking lives (you may want to suggest that they can trust that they know and to no overthink it).

Then invite them to send gratitude to Mother Earth before withdrawing their connection to the level that feels sustainable for moving unencumbered through their lives.

Finally invite them to express gratitude for themselves before bringing their attention fully back to the space you are all sharing and opening their eyes to a soft gaze.

Give everyone a moment to reorient to the outer world again.

You might find that members of the group spontaneously share insights and reflections from their experience or you can invite anyone to share who wants to. And then continue with your gathering.

If you are unable to gather your people in-person, this practice can be shared virtually or by simply imagining yourself surrounded by all your most valued connections and moving through the practice in your mind’s eye. Energy is energy and it is shared in myriad ways; time and geography are not obstacles.

All acts of tending your most valued connections contribute to the tending of the web that connects us all. And it seems to me that we could all benefit from that.

Sending you Love,

Tawnia

PS: If this sounds like something you'd like to do with your valued connections but you don't feel up to guiding it, I am happy to help - leading healing circles and sharing loving energy is kind of my jam. Reply to this email and we can figure out the logistics. I can guide a practice in-person or virtually for your gathering that is in-person or virtual.